I wrote here that I had a team all planned out and ready to go. They were my support and huge part of this happening. Now one of the team members who I knew would contribute massively to this has gone AWOL. I can’t find her, and I don't think she wants to be found. Hey I know the feeling. Sometimes myself, when there are tons of life's surprises, I would love to just run and hide away from it all. But honestly I've learned there is no healing in that (for me anyway).

Well this is where I am really struggling. I know what it is to be overwhelmed and feel like you just can’t give anymore or you’re just spent. But I'm really trying hard to fight the feeling of being hurt—and I guess for lack of a better word, abandoned. I really wouldn't be feeling this way, but I just felt like this person was wonderful. She has tons to contribute to this group, and was just a huge support to me. So I am still feeling let down.

But in all this, Crazy God just won’t leave this alone, and my journey continues. I met a wonderful new friend. She has been a great support to me and loves what I'm about to embark on. She has re-introduced me to a well known organization that in the future possibly could open the door for a lot of great things to come. So the women's group is a go, and I'm excited. In my obvious weakness I’m scared, but I think my heart is being prepared for it all.