At that moment, I knew this was going to affect our relationship. More than anything else, it was going to affect my friend and his family for the rest of their lives.

While my friendship was mainly with him, his brother was never too far behind. My friend was more of a “father figure” in his house than a brother, and I loved that about him. I started to remember his little brother and how he would look up to us.

He was always pretty smart and wanted to feel important. As if he was a part of our crew. He may not have known it, but he was always important then. He may not know it now, but he is still very important.

The life of a little brother in most cases is always lived in the shadow of the big brother, but he surpassed my friend in ways we could never have imagined. He did so because he wasn’t one of us. And I am glad for him.

But all that doesn’t matter much now. Now it is survival time. The physical aspects are tough enough when you’ve gone from H.I.V. to full blown AIDS, but the spiritual survival is even harder all throughout the illness. I hate to say this, but working within the AIDS field has given me much insight, and it’s not very encouraging when it comes to faith.

As a result, what pains my friend the most is not having known for all these years. Eight years to be exact. During that time my friend has been involved in ministry. From his anguish I could tell that he wanted so bad to have been ministering to his brother.

So when his little brother made the decision to not inform his family, he also made the decision to not tell a faith family. He is still not sure about faith, and hasn’t been for a while. I can’t imagine a more important time to start thinking about God.

What would cause this? Why are people with AIDS, like my friend’s brother and many of my clients, so afraid of the church? I am reminded about the times when Jesus was here. The lepers were the AIDS victims of his day. They also needed God more than ever.

While today there is a negative connotation of AIDS and sin, it was not much different in Christ’s culture. Lepers were understood to only have their illness either because of their own sin, or the sin of someone else. Their disease was a reminder of God’s punishment.

Consequently, the lepers were treated as sinful people who deserved their illness. They were not only outcasts of society, but outcasts from God, so they thought. But they needed Jesus, and he came to them. He showed them that no one was outside of God’s grace.

Today the church represents Jesus. Do we go out to our lepers? Sad to say that I’ve seldom seen people of faith come around. I wonder why and for the life of me I can’t figure it out. We’re more willing to reach people with AIDS in another country than in our own back yard.

Regardless of the stereotypes surrounding AIDS, those walking around with this death sentence are walking alone. Their families often cannot be there for them, or largely struggle in doing so.

I’ve learned that when you see people almost everyday leaving your office feeling like lepers, it does something to you. It makes you care about them. You start to see that people are made in the image of God. Apart from of their illness, their lifestyles, and their background, they matter to God, and they should matter to us.

So I tell you little brother, you matter to me. This is a hard time for you and your last days will be painful. You may very well see more overwhelmingly distraught days before you find peace, but you can choose to allow people to join you in a very intimate way. More than that, you can choose to let God join you in a very intimate way.

It’s not too late to find out that God is everything you thought he wasn’t. And your brother and I will be right here with you, if you let us. Love you.